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#1: All intensive purposes
No: For all intensive purposes, this project has concluded.
Yes: For all intents and purposes, this project has concluded.
Note: I had a hard time believing this one is actually loose in the wild and not just cited anecdotally, but I’ve received verification from colleagues that it’s fairly common.
#2: Comprise
No: The company is comprised of talented developers.
Yes: The company comprises talented developers.
No: Seven people comprised the project team.
Yes: The project team comprised seven people.
Note: Used correctly, comprise sometimes sounds weird, or stuffy, or both. There’s no harm in using different phrasing, such as consists of.
#3: Heighth
No: The heighth of the case prevented us from putting the PC under the desk.
Yes: The height of the case prevented us from putting the PC under the desk.
Note: Unlike width and length, height doesn’t end in th. But about one in five people apparently thinkth it does.
#4: Supposably
No: The application supposably blocks the installation of spyware.
Yes: The application supposedly blocks the installation of spyware.
Note: You’ll hear this one a lot, but supposably is not a word. At least not yet.
#5: Irregardless
No: Employees should come to work irregardless of the server problems.
Yes: Employees should come to work regardless of the server problems.
Note: Irregardless isn’t a word either, although it’s commonly treated as one. Maybe with legitimate words like irrelevant and irrepressible crowding the field, the temptation to ir is overwhelming. But it might just be a case of adding a syllable to sound smarter.
#6: Infer/imply
No: When you tell me, “Your management style needs some work,” are you inferring that I’m a lousy boss?
Yes: When you tell me, “Your management style needs some work,” are you implying that I’m a lousy boss?
Note: This is hard to illustrate, because it’s all about context. But the rule is this: If you’re suggesting something, you’re implying it. If you’re interpreting what someone else is telling you, you’re inferring something from what they say. It’s like pitch and catch.
#7: Momento
No: Bring me back some momento from the conference.
Yes: Bring me back some memento from the conference.
Note: Momento is Spanish (and Italian and Portuguese) for moment; it’s not a word in English. If memento gives you trouble, you can always default to souvenir (which, ironically, wasn’t an English word either, but it is now).
#8: Anticlimatic
No: The last episode of The Sopranos was a little anticlimatic.
Yes: The last episode of The Sopranos was a little anticlimactic.
Note: Anticlimactic derives from anticlimax — a letdown. I can’t tell you why it’s not anticlimaxtic. At any rate, it’s never anticlimatic — that’s often said, but it’s not a word. If it were, it would mean against climate. Not really a stand worth taking.
#9: Tenant/tenet
No: The policies committee has presented a list of ethical tenants for employees to follow.
Yes: The policies committee has presented a list of ethical tenets for employees to follow.
Note: Tenets are principles (not principals) or belief systems. Tenants are occupants.
#10: Moot/mute
No: You’ve been late every day for three years; yesterday’s flat tire is a mute point.
Yes: You’ve been late every day for three years; yesterday’s flat tire is a moot point.
Note: Different words altogether; different etymology, different meaning. But enticingly similar enough to fool the unwary. There’s a fair amount of controversy over the correct usage of moot, although moot point is generally taken to mean abstract or irrelevant to this discussion. In that context (or any other I can think of), it’s definitely not mute.
Bonus blunder
I was raised to believe that unique meant one of a kind and that only the most clueless moron would ever qualify it. Hearing someone say somewhat unique or very unique would elevate my smugness to near-toxic levels. Now the rules have changed. Unique can sometimes construe unusual, so it can be qualified out the wazoo. But if you actually do use it to describe something that’s one of a kind, remember that it would sound a little goofy to say it’s somewhat one of a kind. It is or it ain’t.
On a personal note I can not stand the use of "incomprehendable." That word does not exist. I can see why people do it. One is able to comprehend something so surely something could be incomprehendable. Unfortunately if something is impossible to understand, it is actually incomprehensible. Don't ask me why but I have heard literally dozens of people use this.
So comment with your favorite/most annoying gramar mistakes! I realise that some people here have different first languages, are any of these things similar problems in your language?
No: For all intensive purposes, this project has concluded.
Yes: For all intents and purposes, this project has concluded.
Note: I had a hard time believing this one is actually loose in the wild and not just cited anecdotally, but I’ve received verification from colleagues that it’s fairly common.
#2: Comprise
No: The company is comprised of talented developers.
Yes: The company comprises talented developers.
No: Seven people comprised the project team.
Yes: The project team comprised seven people.
Note: Used correctly, comprise sometimes sounds weird, or stuffy, or both. There’s no harm in using different phrasing, such as consists of.
#3: Heighth
No: The heighth of the case prevented us from putting the PC under the desk.
Yes: The height of the case prevented us from putting the PC under the desk.
Note: Unlike width and length, height doesn’t end in th. But about one in five people apparently thinkth it does.
#4: Supposably
No: The application supposably blocks the installation of spyware.
Yes: The application supposedly blocks the installation of spyware.
Note: You’ll hear this one a lot, but supposably is not a word. At least not yet.
#5: Irregardless
No: Employees should come to work irregardless of the server problems.
Yes: Employees should come to work regardless of the server problems.
Note: Irregardless isn’t a word either, although it’s commonly treated as one. Maybe with legitimate words like irrelevant and irrepressible crowding the field, the temptation to ir is overwhelming. But it might just be a case of adding a syllable to sound smarter.
#6: Infer/imply
No: When you tell me, “Your management style needs some work,” are you inferring that I’m a lousy boss?
Yes: When you tell me, “Your management style needs some work,” are you implying that I’m a lousy boss?
Note: This is hard to illustrate, because it’s all about context. But the rule is this: If you’re suggesting something, you’re implying it. If you’re interpreting what someone else is telling you, you’re inferring something from what they say. It’s like pitch and catch.
#7: Momento
No: Bring me back some momento from the conference.
Yes: Bring me back some memento from the conference.
Note: Momento is Spanish (and Italian and Portuguese) for moment; it’s not a word in English. If memento gives you trouble, you can always default to souvenir (which, ironically, wasn’t an English word either, but it is now).
#8: Anticlimatic
No: The last episode of The Sopranos was a little anticlimatic.
Yes: The last episode of The Sopranos was a little anticlimactic.
Note: Anticlimactic derives from anticlimax — a letdown. I can’t tell you why it’s not anticlimaxtic. At any rate, it’s never anticlimatic — that’s often said, but it’s not a word. If it were, it would mean against climate. Not really a stand worth taking.
#9: Tenant/tenet
No: The policies committee has presented a list of ethical tenants for employees to follow.
Yes: The policies committee has presented a list of ethical tenets for employees to follow.
Note: Tenets are principles (not principals) or belief systems. Tenants are occupants.
#10: Moot/mute
No: You’ve been late every day for three years; yesterday’s flat tire is a mute point.
Yes: You’ve been late every day for three years; yesterday’s flat tire is a moot point.
Note: Different words altogether; different etymology, different meaning. But enticingly similar enough to fool the unwary. There’s a fair amount of controversy over the correct usage of moot, although moot point is generally taken to mean abstract or irrelevant to this discussion. In that context (or any other I can think of), it’s definitely not mute.
Bonus blunder
I was raised to believe that unique meant one of a kind and that only the most clueless moron would ever qualify it. Hearing someone say somewhat unique or very unique would elevate my smugness to near-toxic levels. Now the rules have changed. Unique can sometimes construe unusual, so it can be qualified out the wazoo. But if you actually do use it to describe something that’s one of a kind, remember that it would sound a little goofy to say it’s somewhat one of a kind. It is or it ain’t.
On a personal note I can not stand the use of "incomprehendable." That word does not exist. I can see why people do it. One is able to comprehend something so surely something could be incomprehendable. Unfortunately if something is impossible to understand, it is actually incomprehensible. Don't ask me why but I have heard literally dozens of people use this.
So comment with your favorite/most annoying gramar mistakes! I realise that some people here have different first languages, are any of these things similar problems in your language?
If you have not already heard, Walmart has decided to take $470,000 from Debbie Shank, a 52 year old mother of three (One of her sons recently died in Iraq), who was involved in a terrible car accident crippling her short term memory, leaving her in a wheelchair, and in a nursing home.
Because of the fine print of Walmarts health insurance plan, since Debbie was involved in a car accident and was awarded the money to take care of the tragic aftermath, they are entitled to take all the money that was supposed to go to taking care of Debbie.
THEY ACTUALLY WANT $470,000 from this handicapped woman in a wheelchair, who needs it to be taken care of in the future. This coming from a company that made $90 billion last quarter...
Here is the link to the full story:
http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/03/25/walm...
If Bill Bailey hasn't already given you enough reason... stay away from ASDA.
Because of the fine print of Walmarts health insurance plan, since Debbie was involved in a car accident and was awarded the money to take care of the tragic aftermath, they are entitled to take all the money that was supposed to go to taking care of Debbie.
THEY ACTUALLY WANT $470,000 from this handicapped woman in a wheelchair, who needs it to be taken care of in the future. This coming from a company that made $90 billion last quarter...
Here is the link to the full story:
http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/03/25/walm...
If Bill Bailey hasn't already given you enough reason... stay away from ASDA.
I am unable to source any quotes pertaining to the value of my car due to the scarcity of similar models on the market in my locality. Also, local VW dealers are reluctant to provide me with estimations as they are unable to view the condition of the car themselves. I am no longer prepared to run around doing things that I pay you to do. You suggest that I furnish you with adverts to prove that a car of that age is worth £450 . Why don’t you provide me with adverts showing that I can replace it for the £250 that you think its worth?.....no?....that’s right, it is impossible.
My car was insured for £500. It was a 1.6 Volkswagen Golf, it was 17yrs old. It had a new MOT. The mileage , which you suggest is excessive, is still only average for the age of the car. It was in reasonable condition for the year and reliable.
The protagonist of this accident was driving a works van…he rear ended me while I was stationary and about to turn right on an open road with a 40MPH limit …all his fault. He will walk from this absolutely scot free and I will be without the means to replace my car…and that is all I am reasonably asking for, the .means to replace like with like. Meanwhile, I return your cheque to you which you sent to me despite me turning down the offer over the phone and I await your further thoughts on the situation.
Truly,
Katherine Powell.
As you can see, the saga continues...
My car was insured for £500. It was a 1.6 Volkswagen Golf, it was 17yrs old. It had a new MOT. The mileage , which you suggest is excessive, is still only average for the age of the car. It was in reasonable condition for the year and reliable.
The protagonist of this accident was driving a works van…he rear ended me while I was stationary and about to turn right on an open road with a 40MPH limit …all his fault. He will walk from this absolutely scot free and I will be without the means to replace my car…and that is all I am reasonably asking for, the .means to replace like with like. Meanwhile, I return your cheque to you which you sent to me despite me turning down the offer over the phone and I await your further thoughts on the situation.
Truly,
Katherine Powell.
As you can see, the saga continues...
I turned 24 on March the 8th and even though I am nowhere near where I thought I’d be when I was a little girl peering into the future, I can say with a degree of certainty that I am happy, relatively healthy and have some good people around me (even though I do give them shit from time to time). To mark the occasion I went on a ghost hunting expedition with two friends and then I took a trip to London with my mother and my sister to visit the Tutankhamun exhibition.
The ghost trip was disappointingly uneventful. Despite the fact I am a complete sceptic I am also a really big scaredy cat and was actually quite looking forward to jumping out of my skin over perfectly reasonable bumps in the night. So a creepy ghost tour turned into a fantastic night in one of the prettiest buildings I’ve ever seen. Our ghostly stay was in the Skirrid Inn. Apparently it is the most haunted place in Wales thanks, in the main, to a gentleman known as “hanging” Judge Jefferies. That’s pretty self explanatory then. We stayed in room two which was the “judgement room” and just down the hall was the holding cell, which was tiny! Amnesty would have had a field day. Also they have the original beam that they used to hang people from and it still has all the old rope burns on it, yuk. The food was fantastic and we had the run of the bar from about 10:30 onwards. Perhaps the imbibing of all the alcoholic spirits got in the way of the spooky ones… who knows.
London was that strange mixture of ridiculously stressful and great, great fun. I hate London for being like that. I hate how busy it is and how rude everyone is. I can’t stand rudeness! My foot was run over at least three times in two days by arseholes dragging wheelie suitcases around and not giving a shit who they hurt in the process. I actually had to tell one prissy little cunt on the tube to fuck off for glaring at my mother who didn’t psychically realise she wanted to get past. Because honestly, what good are the words “excuse me” when you can just treat someone like shit? The funny thing is I could handle London a lot more easily if that was all I had to deal with but last weekend, as with every visit I have taken there, I will find some little fucking gem or have some sort of experience that I have never had anywhere before and probably wouldn’t have, had I not visited London. This time it was a pub called Bar Ria on Old Street. It was fucking briliant. First off reasonable priced bar and food, that’s very hard to find for a start in London. Then there was the staff who were really lovely, friendly and helpful and the music was brilliant. I never say the music is brilliant in a pub/bar/club because invariably there is some self consciously trendy young man on “decks” spewing out some very popular self consciously trendy bilge. Or, there is a jukebox and I truly hate it when the general public demonstrate their culture through their juke box selections. It only serves to demonstrate the depressing lack of it. However, I do believe that in this establishment there were neither of these hideous contraptions but an integrated sound system of some sort, which is exactly what I would have if I owned such an establishment. Fuck you all, I can hardly trust you to put on anything worthwhile. Anyway, those delightful people played Beth Orton, Captain Beefheart, Bjork and loads of other great stuff. Should any of you get the chance to check the pub out when you are in London please don’t, because when more people go to a place like that it gets shit. I can think of a few local examples as I’m sure you can.
The exhibition was really interesting and it was fantastic to see all those artefacts up close. The workmanship that went into all those headdresses and sculptures is mind boggling. However, the integrity of the exhibition really suffered from it being based in the O2 arena rather than a legitimate museum. The information printed on those little cards was sensational and ropey. I would have preferred dry yet accurate. It was also very, very full. The really annoying people were the ones on a pre-recorded tour narrated by Omar Sharif. Mmm, authentic. One particularly buck toothed creature took her head phones off to ear splittingly consult her friends, “wot’s before common errah?! Wot the ‘ell is tha’?! Sum sor’ of poli’icul correctnuss?” It’s the last part of the statement that staggers me. I don’t care if she doesn’t know that it is academic terminology and has been for years. I don’t care that she doesn’t know that academics have existed all over the world, from many cultures, for many years and obviously have an alternative historical reference point than Christ. It’s her reaction to new information in that aggressive and accusational manner that pisses me off. Why is she here? She doesn’t actually want to learn anything.
The ghost trip was disappointingly uneventful. Despite the fact I am a complete sceptic I am also a really big scaredy cat and was actually quite looking forward to jumping out of my skin over perfectly reasonable bumps in the night. So a creepy ghost tour turned into a fantastic night in one of the prettiest buildings I’ve ever seen. Our ghostly stay was in the Skirrid Inn. Apparently it is the most haunted place in Wales thanks, in the main, to a gentleman known as “hanging” Judge Jefferies. That’s pretty self explanatory then. We stayed in room two which was the “judgement room” and just down the hall was the holding cell, which was tiny! Amnesty would have had a field day. Also they have the original beam that they used to hang people from and it still has all the old rope burns on it, yuk. The food was fantastic and we had the run of the bar from about 10:30 onwards. Perhaps the imbibing of all the alcoholic spirits got in the way of the spooky ones… who knows.
London was that strange mixture of ridiculously stressful and great, great fun. I hate London for being like that. I hate how busy it is and how rude everyone is. I can’t stand rudeness! My foot was run over at least three times in two days by arseholes dragging wheelie suitcases around and not giving a shit who they hurt in the process. I actually had to tell one prissy little cunt on the tube to fuck off for glaring at my mother who didn’t psychically realise she wanted to get past. Because honestly, what good are the words “excuse me” when you can just treat someone like shit? The funny thing is I could handle London a lot more easily if that was all I had to deal with but last weekend, as with every visit I have taken there, I will find some little fucking gem or have some sort of experience that I have never had anywhere before and probably wouldn’t have, had I not visited London. This time it was a pub called Bar Ria on Old Street. It was fucking briliant. First off reasonable priced bar and food, that’s very hard to find for a start in London. Then there was the staff who were really lovely, friendly and helpful and the music was brilliant. I never say the music is brilliant in a pub/bar/club because invariably there is some self consciously trendy young man on “decks” spewing out some very popular self consciously trendy bilge. Or, there is a jukebox and I truly hate it when the general public demonstrate their culture through their juke box selections. It only serves to demonstrate the depressing lack of it. However, I do believe that in this establishment there were neither of these hideous contraptions but an integrated sound system of some sort, which is exactly what I would have if I owned such an establishment. Fuck you all, I can hardly trust you to put on anything worthwhile. Anyway, those delightful people played Beth Orton, Captain Beefheart, Bjork and loads of other great stuff. Should any of you get the chance to check the pub out when you are in London please don’t, because when more people go to a place like that it gets shit. I can think of a few local examples as I’m sure you can.
The exhibition was really interesting and it was fantastic to see all those artefacts up close. The workmanship that went into all those headdresses and sculptures is mind boggling. However, the integrity of the exhibition really suffered from it being based in the O2 arena rather than a legitimate museum. The information printed on those little cards was sensational and ropey. I would have preferred dry yet accurate. It was also very, very full. The really annoying people were the ones on a pre-recorded tour narrated by Omar Sharif. Mmm, authentic. One particularly buck toothed creature took her head phones off to ear splittingly consult her friends, “wot’s before common errah?! Wot the ‘ell is tha’?! Sum sor’ of poli’icul correctnuss?” It’s the last part of the statement that staggers me. I don’t care if she doesn’t know that it is academic terminology and has been for years. I don’t care that she doesn’t know that academics have existed all over the world, from many cultures, for many years and obviously have an alternative historical reference point than Christ. It’s her reaction to new information in that aggressive and accusational manner that pisses me off. Why is she here? She doesn’t actually want to learn anything.
If you are thinking of forwarding a chain email of any kind I want you to stop and think about these two simple and blatantly obvious facts before you do. Should you choose to not do this and send the email anyway the recipient will almost certainly think you are a fucking idiot. That's if they aren't functionally retarded themselves.
1) If the email tells you that some desperately in need victim receives money every time the message is sent or some sort of record will be achieved if more and more are sent STOP! There is no way of calculating the number of times an email is forwarded. WHICH IS QUITE OBVIOUS YOU GORMLESS CRETIN. No one profits, I just die a little inside every time I open one of these sob story made up pieces of shit. Besides if these bleeding heart cases can't even be bothered to register themselves as a charity or contact me in any sort of official way they can fuck off and rot in the gutter because if they think I can trust any of these clearly deficient morons who post on my super wall and fill my inbox with their barely coherant babblings then they are very wrong.
2) The Jamie Bulger case. I can hardly begin to express how much this pisses me off. If you forward that shit you are the most stupid bottom feeder I have ever had the misfortune to know. If you have any sort of opinion on child care or cases of abuse or the criminal justice system do me a favor. RESEARCH! There are many harrowing circumstances that led the perpetrators of the Jamie Bulger case to where they ended up. If you are too lazy to find those out before you click the forward button on your computer you should have your fucking hands amputated for the good of all on your contacts list. Also that case was resolved and those boys were given their anonymity about four years ago so you're a bit late you uniformed easily led dolt!
I am not shouting at everyone. I have some very well informed and intelligent people on my contacts list. I just wish there were more of you.
1) If the email tells you that some desperately in need victim receives money every time the message is sent or some sort of record will be achieved if more and more are sent STOP! There is no way of calculating the number of times an email is forwarded. WHICH IS QUITE OBVIOUS YOU GORMLESS CRETIN. No one profits, I just die a little inside every time I open one of these sob story made up pieces of shit. Besides if these bleeding heart cases can't even be bothered to register themselves as a charity or contact me in any sort of official way they can fuck off and rot in the gutter because if they think I can trust any of these clearly deficient morons who post on my super wall and fill my inbox with their barely coherant babblings then they are very wrong.
2) The Jamie Bulger case. I can hardly begin to express how much this pisses me off. If you forward that shit you are the most stupid bottom feeder I have ever had the misfortune to know. If you have any sort of opinion on child care or cases of abuse or the criminal justice system do me a favor. RESEARCH! There are many harrowing circumstances that led the perpetrators of the Jamie Bulger case to where they ended up. If you are too lazy to find those out before you click the forward button on your computer you should have your fucking hands amputated for the good of all on your contacts list. Also that case was resolved and those boys were given their anonymity about four years ago so you're a bit late you uniformed easily led dolt!
I am not shouting at everyone. I have some very well informed and intelligent people on my contacts list. I just wish there were more of you.